ADHD

You wake up on Monday morning. It's 10:00 A.M. You have the whole day ahead of you - a new week to do the best that you can do to be a functional human being. There's only one small, //slight// drawback. You aren't a normal human being. You have ADHD- Attention Hyperactive Attention Disorder. Your brain is hardwired to make tasks that're simple for other people unnecessarily complicated for you. How fortunate. But on another note, who are you? What is your gender/ what are your pronouns? [[He/Him->He/Him]] [[She/Her->She/Her]] [[They/Them->They/Them]]

Gotcha! You're a dude. As I was saying- You wake up at 10 in the morning on a Monday. You check your phone- your girlfriend texted you. You made plans to spend time with her after class. You have class at 1:00 PM Monday and Wedensday, 3:00 on Tuesday and Thursday, and homework due every day of the week except Friday. Keep all that in mind- if you can. But those are all later problems. For now, you have three options to start your day. You can: [[Get up and get ready for class.->Get ready for class]] [[Hit snooze on your alarm. ->Hit snooze]] [[Go back to sleep entirely- fuck the alarm.->Go back to sleep ]]

Gotcha! You're a woman. You wake up at 10 in the morning on a Monday. You check your phone- your girlfriend texted you. You made plans to spend time with her after class. You have class at 1:00 PM Monday and Wedensday, 3:00 on Tuesday and Thursday, and homework due every day of the week except Friday. Keep all that in mind- if you can. But those are all later problems. For now, you have three options to start your day. You can: [[Get up and get ready for class.->Get ready for class]] [[Hit snooze on your alarm. ->Hit snooze]] [[Go back to sleep entirely- fuck the alarm.->Go back to sleep ]]

Gotcha! You wake up at 10 in the morning on a Monday. You check your phone- your girlfriend texted you. You made plans to spend time with her after class. You have class at 1:00 PM Monday and Wedensday, 3:00 on Tuesday and Thursday, and homework due every day of the week except Friday. Keep all that in mind- if you can. But those are all later problems. For now, you have three options to start your day. You can: [[Get up and get ready for class.->Get ready for class]] [[Hit snooze on your alarm. ->Hit snooze]] [[Go back to sleep entirely- fuck the alarm.->Go back to sleep ]]

You get up and get ready for class. You've got two and a half hours before you have to be on campus, that's plenty of time, right? Awesome. To be a productive human being, you need to: [[Eat->Thirty minute time sink]] [[Brush your teeth->Ten minute time sink]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->Five minute time sink]] [[Pack your shit->15 minute time sink]] That being said, you COULD also (if you wanted to, that is): (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

You hit snooze and sleep for another thirty minutes. That's fine- you don't have class until 1:00. That being said, you should be out of the house by 12:30 if you're gonna make it on time. But it's cool, you have plenty of time to do what you gotta do. To be a productive human being, you need to: [[Eat->Thirty minute time sink]] [[Brush your teeth->Ten minute time sink]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->15 minute time sink]] [[Pack your shit->15 minute time sink]] That being said, you COULD also (if you wanted to, that is): (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

You wake up after going back to sleep without setting an alarm. What time is it? [[Check time.->FUCK!]]

Oh fuck, oh shit. It's already 12:30- how is it already 12:30? Goddamit, it happened again. You're gonna be late. How many times has this happened this semester? You have two options. You can suck it up and go to class, which doesn't seem like a big deal. But... you know what's waiting for you. //The look.// God, you HATE the look. The one your classmates shoot you when you walk in late, that makes you feel like you can read their minds. They're thinking, //"Why're you even here if you can't take this shit seriously? Don't you know you pay to be here? Don't you know you're disrupting us every time you pull this stunt?"// Then you get it from your professor, but they shoot it at you for a few reasons. Sometimes they resent you, sometimes they pitty you. Either way you feel like an asshole. So yeah, you could [[suck it up->Suck it up.]]. Or, you could- and here me out... (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->Skipping Class]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->Skipping Class]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->Skipping Class]]]!]

Food. Food is important- self care and all that. You cook a good breakfast for yourself and enjoy it thoroughly. After all, what's the point of eating without enjoying? The rest of what you have to do before class: [[Brush your teeth->Ten minute time sink 2]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->15 minute time sink 2]] [[Pack your shit->15 minute time sink 2]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

You brush your teeth. Congrats! That's ten minutes off your radar. Don't forget to go to class, though. Remember the commute time too. What time is it? Nevermind. Now, you can- [[Eat->Thirty minute time sink 3]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->15 minute time sink 3]] [[Pack your shit->Five minute time sink 3]] By the way, did I also mention, THESE options? They're //really// fun. (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

You get in the shower. The water is warm, and your thoughts start drifting. A daydream- a nice one. In what feels like an instant, you're absorbed in your mind and nothing else in the universe is real. Then, you're back to reality, and the world becomes tangible again. [[Wasn't there something else you were supposed to be thinking about?->FUCK!]]

You pack your stuff for class. Good job! It only took you fifteen minutes today. The rest of what you have to do before class: [[Eat->Thirty minute time sink 4]] [[Brush your teeth->Ten minute time sink 4]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->15 minute time sink 4]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

You pass the time drifting in and out of conciousness, getting distracted by your phone, and being a generally non-produtive shitbag. Congratulations. It's after 1:00 - wasn't there something you were supposed to be doing? [[(text-style:"sway")[Homework]->GF Text (but homework done)]] (link-goto:"(text-style:\"wavy-underline\",\"emboss\",\"rumble\")[(bg:red)[Read that book you know you //really// want to read. ]]","GF Text") (text-style:"subscript","blurrier","condense","mirror","fade-in-out")[[[girlfriend->dodged it]]] [[Get food on campus->GF Text]]

You go to class, and surprise surprise, you get //the look//. Tragic. Whatever, such is life. This class is important- you really, really, ''REALLY'' need this grade. (text-style:"rumble")[(text-colour:red)[[[DAYDREAM->DAYDREAM]]]] (text-style:"double-strike","blurrier","condense","mirror")[(text-rotate-x:293)[pay attention]]

You've gotten dressed. Another thing off the docket to do. Great! [[Eat->Thirty minute time sink 5]] [[Brush your teeth->Ten minute time sink 5]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Pack your shit->Five minute time sink 5]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

You pack your stuff for class. Good job! It only took you fifteen minutes today. The rest of what you have to do before class: [[Brush your teeth->Ten minute time sink 6]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->Five minute time sink 6]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

You brush your teeth. Congrats! That's ten minutes off your radar. Don't forget to go to class, though. Remember the commute time too. What time is it? Nevermind. [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->15 minute time sink 3]] [[Pack your shit->15 minute time sink 3]]

You've gotten dressed. Another thing off the docket to do. Great! [[Brush your teeth->Ten minute time sink 6]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->Five minute time sink 6]] [[Pack your shit->Five minute time sink 6]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

Food. Food is important- self care and all that. You cook a good breakfast for yourself and enjoy it thoroughly. After all, what's the point of eating without enjoying? The rest of what you have to do before class: [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->Five minute time sink 7]] [[Pack your shit->15 minute time sink 7]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

You pack your stuff for class. Good job! It only took you fifteen minutes today. The rest of what you have to do before class: [[Eat->Thirty minute time sink 10]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Get dressed->15 minute time sink 10]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

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You've gotten dressed. Another thing off the docket to do. Great! [[Eat->Thirty minute time sink 9]] [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Pack your shit->15 minute time sink 9]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

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You've gotten dressed. Another thing off the docket to do. Great! [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Pack your shit->15 minute time sink 11]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

Food. Food is important- self care and all that. You cook a good breakfast for yourself and enjoy it thoroughly. After all, what's the point of eating without enjoying? The rest of what you have to do before class: [[Shower->Hour time sink]] [[Pack your shit->15 minute time sink 12]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

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You pack your stuff for class. Good job! It only took you fifteen minutes today. The rest of what you have to do before class: [[Shower->Hour time sink]] (text-style:"expand","rumble")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[WATCH TV->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"shudder")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[LOOK AT YOUR PHONE->FUCK!]]]!] (text-style:"sway")[(bg:(gradient: 0, 0,#ffffff,0.5029,#ff2600,1,#ffffff))[[[PLAY VIDEO GAMES->FUCK!]]]!]

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//Ding. New text from: Grace // "?" Oh FUCK - that's right. Girlfriend. You were //supposed// to be with your girlfriend. An hour ago. It happened again. You get to her apartment and she's pissed. Visibly pissed. The kind of angry that can't be hidden no matter how hard you try. It leaks out in clipped sentences, short glares. It wouldn't be a big deal at all - if this wasn't a regular thing. Your life- and now, by extension, //her life//, continually disrupted by intrusions beyond your control. It has a tendency to leave even the most patient partner feeling unloved and abandoned. After all, how would YOU feel if every time you made a plan with someone, there was a fifty fifty chance they'd drop off the face of the earth and leave you hanging? Again, and again, and //again.// You spend the rest of the evening on the back foot, trying to make up for doing the same thing you did last week... and the week before... and the week before... She gets over it. For now. You salvage the night and have a good time. It's time to go [[home.->Home]]

That's right- Grace! You head over to your girlfriend's place and get there relatively on time-ish. Good for you. You spend a nice evening in eating ice-cream and watching movies about dogs, because it's her turn to pick, and she sat through //Goodfellas// very patiently, despite the fact it's wildly more misogynistic than you remember from when you were twelve, and she loathes violence, even just the on screen kind. Plus, //Oliver And Company// is a really cute movie. And Billy Joel is in it. After a good evening, it's time to go [[home->Home]].

Good job. You survived another day. You might be asking yourself, reader. "Who is the narrator of my story?" It's me - your ADHD. I'm the one wrecking your fucking life. You might //think// you have some choice in the matter. But you don't. To quote Otis. T. Driftwood from //House Of A 1000 Corpses// - "I am the devil; and I'm here to do the devil's work." But regardless, it's now the evening, and you have tomorrow to look forward to. You can: (link-goto:"(text-colour:red)[(text-style:\"double-underline\",\"superscript\",\"outline\",\"expand\",\"rumble\")[STAY UP LATE]]","bedtime") [[(text-style:"double-strike","subscript","blurrier","condense","mirror","fade-in-out")[go to bed]->bedtime]]

Good job. You survived another day. You might be asking yourself, reader. "Who is the narrator of my story?" It's me - your ADHD. I'm the one wrecking your fucking life. You might //think// you have some choice in the matter. But you don't. To quote Otis. T. Driftwood from //House Of A 1000 Corpses// - "I am the devil; and I'm here to do the devil's work." But regardless, it's now the evening, and you have tomorrow to look forward to. You can: (link-goto:"(text-colour:red)[(text-style:\"double-underline\",\"superscript\",\"outline\",\"expand\",\"rumble\")[STAY UP LATE]]","bedtime 2") [[(text-style:"double-strike","subscript","blurrier","condense","mirror","fade-in-out")[go to bed]->bedtime 2]]

Finally, after a long day (and plenty of distraction) you're about to go to bed. Oh, by the way, did you do your homework? Don't fucking lie to me- I know all and see all. [[Yes->liar]] [[No->another chance]]

Finally, after a long day (and plenty of distraction) you're about to go to bed. Oh, by the way, did you do your homework? Don't fucking lie to me- I know all and see all. [[Yes->peaceful sleep]] [[No->peaceful sleep 2]]

[[You climb into bed and fall asleep, ready for another day with your nose to the grindstone. ->wake up rested (homework done)]]

I'm assuming you're not dumb enough to lie intentionally when you //did the thing you were supposed to do//, so I'm gonna assume you just forgot. Pretty normal for someone with ADHD. [[You climb into bed and fall asleep quick- another day done, another day on the way. ->wake up rested (homework done)]]

All good. Panic and deadlines tend to activate the focus side of ADHD. Now you have more of a choice than an impulse. [[Wanna do your homework?->wake up tired (homework done)]] [[Or go to sleep. ->wake up rested (homework not done)]] The choice //will// matter.

No. You didn't do your homework. You //know// you didn't. You wanna lie to me? Fine. I'll lie to you. You'll //definitely// get it done before class tomorrow. [[Go the fuck to sleep. ->wake up tired (homework not done)]]

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